Friday, October 11, 2013

Young Korean people's opinions on international dating and marriage

Many of my subscribers and readers of my Youtube and blog want to know how open Korean people are about international dating and marriage.

I asked what kind of questions that want to know about Koreans, and many people commented on the video.

I interviewed my students and picked the questions that were most asked by people and asked the questions.


I interviewed 6 students of mine. They are all Korean born and raised in Korea.
These are the questions that I asked them.
1. Would you date someone outside of your race/country?
2. What would you do if your parents disapprove of you dating or marrying someone outside of your race?
3. Do you believe African Americans all act and look like we are portrayed on TV?
4. Do you want your girlfriend/wife to learn Korean or will you learn English?
5. Do you want her to move to Korea or will you move to her country to live?
6. As a Korean man, do you get upset when you see Korean women date foreign men?

The first student that I interviewed was Adam.

He didn't want to show his face on the video, but later on another video, you will be able to see his face! :)

His answer was

1. Would you date someone outside of your race/country? Yes.
2. What would you do if your parents disapprove of you dating or marrying someone outside of your race? He would elope. He said he is still young and has that kind of courage. :)
3. Do you believe African Americans all act and look like we are portrayed on TV? He said Black people have their certain fashion and vibe. He met little black boys (around 7 years old) in Australia, and they wore hiphop clothes and looked very much like how they were portrayed on TV.
4. Do you want your girlfriend/wife to learn Korean or will you learn English? He said he would first communicate with her in English, but he will teach her Korean so that they can communicated in Korean as well later on.
5. Do you want her to move to Korea or will you move to her country to live? He wants to live abroad.
6. As a Korean man, do you get upset when you see Korean women date foreign men? A little bit. He thinks that some Korean girls change the way they behave after they date foreign men. Their attitude change in a bad way.

He was being honest and I appreciate his opinions.

The second student that I interviewed was Justino. He is a very honest guy. 


1. Would you date someone outside of your race/country? Yes, but she said he would marry a Korean woman.
2. What would you do if your parents disapprove of you dating or marrying someone outside of your race? He wouldn't care about their opinion because they are always against his opinion. lol.
3. Do you believe African Americans all act and look like we are portrayed on TV? He doesn't think so.
4. Do you want your girlfriend/wife to learn Korean or will you learn English? He doesn't want to push his girlfriend/wife to learn Korean, so he will learn English.
5. Do you want her to move to Korea or will you move to her country to live? He doesn't care where he lives.
6. As a Korean man, do you get upset when you see Korean women date foreign men? Not at all.

My third interviewee was a woman. Her name is Irene, and she is good at Chinese and English.


1. Would you date someone outside of your race/country? Yes.
2. What would you do if your parents disapprove of you dating or marrying someone outside of your race? She thinks that her parents would be ok with anyone that she chooses because she is a bit older than other Korean women who get married.
3. Do you believe African Americans all act and look like we are portrayed on TV? No.
4. Do you want your boyfriend/husband to learn Korean or will you learn English? If her husband cannot speak Korean, she will learn his language. If he speaks Korean, they will communicate in Korean.
5. Do you want him to move to Korea or will you move to his country to live? She can live anywhere.
6. As a Korean woman, do you get upset when you see Korean men date foreign women? No. She thinks that is very stupid to do that.

The next person that I interviewed was Troy. He is a married man who said he cannot have a chance to date anyone who is outside of his race. He was being very honest about answering his questions. He is good at Japanese.
1. Would you date someone outside of your race/country? He said he would not. Obviously, he is already married, so he said it. lol. He said he would not because the cultural difference would frustrate him.
2. What would you do if your parents disapprove of you dating or marrying someone outside of your race? He thinks that his parents are very open-minded so they would accept it.
3. Do you believe African Americans all act and look like we are portrayed on TV? No.
4. Do you want your girlfriend/wife to learn Korean or will you learn English? He will learn English.
5. Do you want her to move to Korea or will you move to her country to live? He wants to move to USA.
6. As a Korean man, do you get upset when you see Korean women date foreign men? No.

The next one was a woman again! :) She has the most hits among all the interviewee's videos. She said she likes Black men because they have good bodies. :) She is a very sweet girl. Her name is Bella.

1. Would you date someone outside of your race/country? Yes!
2. What would you do if your parents disapprove of you dating or marrying someone outside of your race? She would try to make her parents meet her boyfriend several times so that they can get to know each other. She thinks that her parents would accept him because they like her and they trust her. (That is exactly what happened to me!!!!)
3. Do you believe African Americans all act and look like we are portrayed on TV? No. She LIKES BLACK MEN!
4. Do you want your boyfriend/husband to learn Korean or will you learn English? She will learn English and he will need to learn Korean so that they can understand each other's culture better.
5. Do you want him to move to Korea or will you move to his country to live? She wants to live in another country.
6. As a Korean woman, do you get upset when you see Korean men date foreign women? No.

The last person that I interviewed was Kevin. He is very studious and never skipped my class. He is not married yet(he didn't believe in marriage), but he is thinking about getting married soon since his girlfriend wants it.

1. Would you date someone outside of your race/country? Yes, but he would not marry them.
2. What would you do if your parents disapprove of you dating or marrying someone outside of your race? He would think about dating and marrying her again.
3. Do you believe African Americans all act and look like we are portrayed on TV? No, but Black men are a bit scary. (Maybe because they are big. He only met one Black man in person in his life.)
4. Do you want your girlfriend/wife to learn Korean or will you learn English? He will learn English, but he will teach her Korean as well.
5. Do you want her to move to Korea or will you move to her country to live? He wants to move to another country since he has lived in Korea for his entire life.
6. As a Korean man, do you get upset when you see Korean women date foreign men? No.



After I uploaded these videos, many of them asked my students if they would marry (not date but marry) foreigners. So, I asked them the question and made another video.

Three out of four men said, they would not marry someone outside of their race or they would hesitate if their parents are against it. Only Adam said he would because he is young and wild. LOL. Irene was not in class because of her business trip, so I only interviewed Bella. She said she would marry and I believe that Irene would probably say she would marry, too.

They wanted to ask foreigners questions, so we made a video of asking questions.
The questions are
1. If you got married to a Korean, would you learn Korean and could you live in Korea? - by Troy
2. To WOMEN : If you want to get married to a Korean man, are you willing to cook Korean food and eat it almost everyday? - by Kevin
3. TO MEN : What do you think about Korean women? - by Bella
4. TO WOMEN: What do you think about Korean men's obligation to go to Korean army for 2 years? - by Adam

If you want to answer the questions or want to check out other people's answers, watch the video on Youtube, and you will be able to see the comments. :)




24 comments:

  1. as a guy i would say about bella question that the best thing i love about korean woman is their eyes. i think i love korean woman mostly because of their eyes and cuteness.

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  2. 1. I would learn Korean before marrying. If I ever get married to Korean guy I would love to live in Korea but I'm very picky when it comes to men, I can never date a guy that I don't have feelings for, even if I think he's drop dead sexy. XD

    2. Yes, but it'd be great if he also eats food from my country.. Just the ones that he likes..

    4. I've never really thought about it before, but when I was in Japan I made some Korean friends and one of them had to go back to Korea to join the army. School was so boring without him.

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  3. Korean women may be cute, but they can also be very feisty when in a relationship. I experienced their jealous nature first hand ; )

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  4. Hello Lily and James. Congratulations on the happy marriage and second baby.

    I'm visiting a friend in Korea next month for vacation so I did some internet surfing and came across your blog today. I'm also a black man, so I appreciate seeing things from your perspective on the culture differences.

    To answer your questions:
    1. If you got married to a Korean, would you learn Korean and could you live in Korea? - by Troy
    I would definitely learn Korean. Not only would it help us understand each other, as a person I'm inquisitive in nature so I'd like to know what's going on when she's talking in hangul. Plus, I'm pretty sure things would get awkward fast if I was quiet every time we went out and I had to wait for her to translate when meeting her friends and family. As far as if I'd want to live in Korea, I'd say yes if I found a good job there. From the minimal understanding I have of the work scene in Korea, it's a bit different from America as far as pay and expectations are concerned.

    3. TO MEN : What do you think about Korean women? - by Bella. Korean women are very cute. In my opinion, they like things that are considered sweet, goofy, and charming/romantic by american standards. They also seem to give off a more innocent and feminine vibe. I like it. But I was raised old school by my parents in the south. You know, open doors for women, polite to my elders. That sort of thing. So basically, it's just my style.

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  5. Anonymous28/1/14 00:45

    I reallly do not know how I got to this sight, LOL. But I will answer your questions. I am a African American Woman....this will be fun : )

    The questions are
    1. If you got married to a Korean, would you learn Korean and could you live in Korea? - by Troy

    A. I would definitely learn Korean if I lived in Korea out of respect. I believe if you are living/staying in someone else's country then you should learn the language and abide by the rules of the land. But, I don't think I could see myself living there longer then 5 years, I think I would miss America too much. : )

    2. To WOMEN : If you want to get married to a Korean man, are you willing to cook Korean food and eat it almost everyday? - by Kevin

    I love Korean food, so that definitely would not be a problem for me......heck, I love all kinds of food!
    3. TO MEN : What do you think about Korean women? - by Bella
    4. TO WOMEN: What do you think about Korean men's obligation to go to Korean army for 2 years? - by Adam

    I don't believe in war! That's my answer.

    ReplyDelete
  6. 1. Yes I would learn Korean, I am now! And I'd have to think about living in Korea, I'm very used to America.
    2. Yes! I really want to try Korean food. So I would learn how to make Korean food and cook it for him. :) 4. I would be worried obviously, but it's mandatory for Korean men, so I would be OK with it.

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  7. I am brown man from south asia.
    I came to Korea with a fixed mindset of not getting married. But this cute English speaking Korean girl changed my mind over a course of 6months. We mostly met at coffee at office and chatted on various things including sharing details about our personal life. The cupid stuck me at some point and I made my intentions known to her in our first date during dinner outside office.
    after that she went cold for 2-3 weeks telling she is busy in work. But during that time
    she was in continious contact with my Korean colleague and went out with him for coffee and dinners.
    it really hurt me. I was there with her when she had breakup with her boyfriend and on other occasions when was humiliated by other workers. Whenever she was sad she made sure she was with me as I would make her happy. She had teased me with she being my girlfriend and wife which prompted me to change my mind.
    I am learning Korean, living korean style, ready to settle for anywhere in this world for her.
    I have considered her dreams about future life as important as mine and started to think of realizing them, I built a dream with her as my life partner. Even have decided to non-vegetarian.
    Now I feel empty. Liked the korean girl for her nature of openness, understanding of struggle in leading life, and family and of course the cutie she is.
    I really love her and expect that she will soon see through the skin and accept me for my good nature and love towards her.
    Hope it happens soon....

    ReplyDelete
  8. I found this blog interesting even though it does seem to be a bit old. I am a young American Hispanic female ( I wish they had answers about that :/) Here are my answers:
    1. If I were married to a Korean man I would learn Korean. Not only do I like the language, but I also feel that it is respectful to him and his culture. I would live in Korea if it made BOTH of us happy.

    2. I would be willing to cook and eat Korean food; however, I don't think that I could eat it everyday. Although I do enjoy Korean food, I live in an area where different types of food are everywhere and unfortunately, I would get tired of it if I ate it everyday. I would try to mix it up throughout the week. I would hope that he would want the same :)

    3. NA

    4. I respect that Korean Men are required to join the military for 2 Years. I believe that men in the Korean military grow up quite a bit and I think living in that type of environment allows a person to mature.

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  9. Anonymous27/4/14 15:18

    I'm a latin girl and here are my answers:

    1- would learn korean before hand but, it would be nice if he was willing to learn spanish
    2- I'm very picky about food, I would make up some kind of cuisine fusion between korean and colombian food. Or mix up the days in which we would eat korean or colombian food.
    3- NA
    4- I would be lonely if he left for 2 years, but wait patient and eagerly :)

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  10. I will marry a Korean man and cook Korean food because I like to cook international food :)

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  11. Seems like Koreans are loved world over. I had this girl who had a thing for Korean guys. They must be really good.

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  12. 1. If you got married to a Korean, would you learn Korean and could you live in Korea?
    - We would probably decide where we wanted to live before we got married, but I would be open to living in Korea, if that was best for both of us. I would definitely try my best to learn Korean, but also hope he would learn English!

    2. To WOMEN : If you want to get married to a Korean man, are you willing to cook Korean food and eat it almost everyday?
    - I don't think anybody, my hypothetical Korean husband included, wants to suffer through my cooking! I enjoy eating all kinds of foods, so probably we would not eat Korean food EVERY day... And I doubt I would be the one cooking all the time either. I like a guy who can cook. ;)

    3. TO MEN : What do you think about Korean women?
    - Well, I'm not a guy, but I think Korean ladies are very pretty!!

    4. TO WOMEN: What do you think about Korean men's obligation to go to Korean army for 2 years?
    - It's different from what I am used to, growing up in the US, so I hesitate to label it 'good' or 'bad'. If I was a mother, I wouldn't want my son to be in the army... And if I was dating a guy who hadn't served yet, I would be sad to have him gone for so long. But it is what it is, and if you love someone, you can wait for them!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous4/9/14 17:31

    Yes. I would learn korean.
    Cooking the same food everyday would get old, besides the question on if I would cook for a man everyday is a bit old fashion and sexist. I would hope we as a couple would share in the responsibilities of the household. I'm not into being a slave for anyone and I would hope my husband would have a more modern mindset and not stuck in gender roles...way to 1950's in my opinion. I am married to a westernized Korean national and our relationship is 50/50 on all things. I'm very lucky.

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  14. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  15. I hope people understand that what we see on kpop and dpop or whatever is significantly differently from real life!

    ReplyDelete
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    The questions are
    1. If you got married to a Korean, would you learn Korean and could you live in Korea? - by Troy

    *Yes, coz I'm interested in learning the language and I don't wanna be left out when he's talking to his korean friends.

    2. To WOMEN : If you want to get married to a Korean man, are you willing to cook Korean food and eat it almost everyday? - by Kevin

    *I eat korean food mostly everyday and I wanna know how they cook it. I love the side dishes, cham pong,kimbop and tteopokki. correct me if the spelling is wrong.

    3. TO WOMEN: What do you think about Korean men's obligation to go to Korean army for 2 years? - by Adam

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    ReplyDelete
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    The questions are
    1. If you got married to a Korean, would you learn Korean and could you live in Korea? - by Troy

    *Yes, coz I'm interested in learning the language and I don't wanna be left out when he's talking to his korean friends.

    2. To WOMEN : If you want to get married to a Korean man, are you willing to cook Korean food and eat it almost everyday? - by Kevin

    *I eat korean food mostly everyday and I wanna know how they cook it. I love the side dishes, cham pong,kimbop and tteopokki. correct me if the spelling is wrong.

    3. TO WOMEN: What do you think about Korean men's obligation to go to Korean army for 2 years? - by Adam

    *all I know based on the guy I am dating right now. it is mandatory to go to army just in case there is a war. you can rely on the men coz they have enough experience to protect the country.

    ReplyDelete

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